welfy: (church lady)
welfy ([personal profile] welfy) wrote2006-01-19 04:10 pm
Entry tags:

offensive church bulletin?

Two pictures of the fateful "fake" bulletin: (there were more pages but I didn't have time to take pictures of them before it was STOLEN from me) Ugh I wish I hadn't put "welfy" on there. Or ANY name. I am retarded.





[identity profile] mylastsigh.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
WONDERFUL!!!

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 03:55 am (UTC)(link)
The other three pages were wonderful, too. I wish I could remember exactly what I wrote!

[identity profile] kbcommando.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
I think it's really funny but I can see how some stuffy people might take offense to it... :(

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 03:58 am (UTC)(link)
Unfortunately, the one lady who would have found it, to me, seems a bit stuffy.

One time she got upset because I wrote in the bulletin about some benefit dinner for some dying girl, because

1) I added that there would be a raffle, but OMG THE CHURCH DOES NOT SUPPORT GAMBLING AND WE WILL GO TO HELL FOR MENTIONING IT, and

2) she didn't like that I put it in a prominant place on the bulletin. Since it wasn't someone from our church who was dying, she thought it should have been on the back because people in church are in "a worshipful mood and don't need to see that announcement right in front of them." WHAT. THE. HELL. DYING GIRL. THIS SHOULD BE IMPORTANT!!!!

[identity profile] tat2whttrsh.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:14 pm (UTC)(link)
That's really cute.

I really don't see anything that would make anyone super angry.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 05:09 am (UTC)(link)
There was this one part on another page that said, "There will be a love offering (if you know what I mean)"...hehe. I thought it was amusing!!
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[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 05:10 am (UTC)(link)
I like Jon Lovitz a lot. Especially when he is king of a planet like in Mom and Dad Save the World. :^)
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[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com - 2006-01-20 07:47 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] hillarygayle.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Meh, someone super stuffy might get mad, but I don't think it's firing material. I'd be very surprised if they let you go over this.

That said, i think it's hilarious.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 04:46 am (UTC)(link)
This woman who would have picked it up seems a bit stuffy, but she's usually friendly. If anything, I feel like she has this very fake sincerity that really grates on my nerves.

[identity profile] neanahe.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:19 pm (UTC)(link)
I think it's hilarious, but then I'm a Methodist.

Maybe going to the people in charge and fessing up so that they hear it from you first and can put it in perspective (it was a joke for your Mom; who doesn't like Moms?) will soften the impact?

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 04:49 am (UTC)(link)
The Methodists are good people. :^) My dad had been a methodist before he joined the Presbyterian church and whenever we traveled and couldn't find a Presby place, we'd find a Methodist one.

I don't know. I'm afraid to even mention that it is missing because then it will seem like I'm overly concerned over something that I shouldn't have been doing anyway (even though there is no proof that I MADE it at church...I could have said that I needed to use the copying machine...). UGH THIS WHOLE SITUATION IS SO STUPID!!

[identity profile] wellmax.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
That is so hilarious! Thanks for posting it.

I think the only line that might really get you in trouble is the "Welfy hates the phone, so she probably won't include your stupid announcements anyway."

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah...which would be a lie anyway, because I post everyone's announcements no matter what it is. This entire thing was extremely exagerrated. I always answer the phone, too!

I worry about the line on one of the not-photographed pages that says, "There will be a love offering (if you know what I mean)"...

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[identity profile] tiny-nomad.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:21 pm (UTC)(link)
I would like to RSVP for the Polka Party.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 05:11 am (UTC)(link)
Me, too! I actually kind of like polka. Reminds me of my Pap-Pap who passed away.

[identity profile] goingincirclez.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Ha ha that's great! I'd actually go there!

Unfortunately most of the people I know 'round these parts would promptly gasp "Blasphemy!" with their last pre-coronary breath. Which incidentally explains why I don't go to church anymore...

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:24 pm (UTC)(link)
My mom actually BROUGHT IT to the church WE go to, and they thought it was a riot. But Presbyterians seem to have a good sense of humor about things, at least in this area!

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[identity profile] beagledave.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:26 pm (UTC)(link)
"Hands In The Air Crazy Praise Songs".

Awesome.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
That is a big issue with so many churches, unfortunately, so I thought I'd poke fun at it. :^P I've seen people leave churches when the worship style got changed. I personally like the boring hymnbook songs.

[identity profile] christophrawr.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh man...

I'd prepare for the worst. That part about the tithes is *not* going to go over well. :/

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:32 pm (UTC)(link)
The thing is, this isn't poking fun at this particular church. ALL churches have their members pay tithes.

That's better than the youth announcement where I cheerfully wrote that the youth were meeting to bash in mailboxes for those who don't pay tithe. :^\

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[identity profile] odinyotoo.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Haha! Family of giants made me laugh out loud. If this gets you fired at least you'll have a great story in a few years. I truly don't think it will. It isn't as if you've poked fun at anyone at the church personally or anything... just yourself.

[identity profile] gr8kat.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 11:29 pm (UTC)(link)
The family of giants was my favorite part, too! :D

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[identity profile] justneverended.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:32 pm (UTC)(link)
oh man, welfy, you are a comic genius.

if they get mad, they just take themselves too seriously.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 06:59 am (UTC)(link)
I hope it either 1) shows up again (it was my only copy dammit!) or 2) no one ever, EVER mentions it to me. Like, ever. Yeah. This is so embarrassing, haha! Reminds me of the time Dr. Hanna called me during the summer to tell me to take down the user icon of him that we used in the Geneva College community.

[identity profile] starcrossedlady.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:34 pm (UTC)(link)
I think it's totally cute, but... well, if anyone should ask, tell them the truth: You had a little free time on your hands and was playing around with format and stuff like that. You didn't put it up as a way to hurt anyone in the church and if they really don't like it, tell them you won't do it again.

Personally, if they are going to let you go over something like this, then they don't deserve you. just sayin.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 06:41 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah. Mom told me that they're not worth working for if they're going to fire me over something so petty. My mother is one of the most devout Christians that I know and yet she's so down-to-earth and cool...and SHE thought it was the greatest thing ever. She showed it to everyone who came to the house!

[identity profile] angabel.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Loffle.

Is there a possibility that she could have taken it to show to other people because she thought it was so funny?

I think you'll be all right.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 04:33 am (UTC)(link)
That is the best thing I could ever hope for, though if this lady ever found it I'd prefer that she just threw it away. Her husband is my boss and I'm wary of what might happen if they don't approve of what I did.

[identity profile] kore.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:41 pm (UTC)(link)
i think it's wonderful.

hopefully theyhave a sense of humor about themselves. or a spry bird flew in the window & took yr bulletin to line it's nest.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 06:39 am (UTC)(link)
If only my office had a window! *wistful*

[identity profile] soopageek.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:43 pm (UTC)(link)
wwww, man! Now I'll never get to see it!

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:45 pm (UTC)(link)
SOMEONE was too sleepy this morning to look at it! :^)

It's okay though. I'm sure I could replicate some of the missing parts, though now I'm so paranoid about leaving it there that I don't know. I guess this incident won't stop me from being a total dork.

[identity profile] suesniffsglue.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:47 pm (UTC)(link)
oh no haha that's sooooo funny though!
here's to hoping they'll have a sense of humor about it
maybe old-lady-who-took-it thought it was funny and just wanted to show it off at card club or something

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, this wasn't the old-old lady who took it...this is my boss's wife! Treasurer-lady would have been nice enough to leave it alone!

Pray for this situation to not be a disaster. :^\

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[identity profile] theashifaction.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:51 pm (UTC)(link)
hahahahah the giants killed me.

but hey, maybe this is god's way of letting you have that month off for that road trip you wanted to take! he works in mysterious ways you know. he MADE you forget it there!

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 05:13 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah! Not only will I get a month off but I won't have to go back! :^D Except then that means I will probably have to eventually find another job and I'm sure it will be ten times worse. This is SUCH a slacker job because everything is so easy that I get it done too fast and then I have loads of free time. Which is why fake church bulletins get made.

[identity profile] rival.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 09:51 pm (UTC)(link)
I like the giants the best.

Srsly d00d. Some people don't know awesome when they see it.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 04:07 am (UTC)(link)
I'm hoping SHE thought it was awesome, but she doesn't seem to think things like that would be awesome. She's the reason I'm afraid to bring bobble-head Jesus to my office. :^(

[identity profile] vespered.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 10:05 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry. Scott and I read it and laughed a lot.

I hate that the woman with no sense of humor probably saw it, though.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
Don't be sorry. :^) I'm glad it's entertaining people, even though I meant to make it just for my own amusement! (Well, and my mom's)

I KNOW. It makes my blood boil to think that she has even TOUCHED my bulletin since she's like the least-funny person ever. She's really cheery and I often feel she's insincere at the same time. She also likes to nag and talk to me like I am 5 years old. (and she's not even my boss! she's my boss's wife!)

[identity profile] enattendant.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 10:12 pm (UTC)(link)
I think it's funny, and I hope the person who took it thinks the same. I'm sure that they realize that you're over-competent for the job, and that you need something to do with the spare time. Hey, maybe they'll just buy you a Sudoku book or a Christian Crossword book.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 04:03 am (UTC)(link)
Someone told me that I should NEVER tell them that I have "nothing to do" or they'll get mad or just make me do more work. I LIKE working, and I'm fine with them giving me more to do...but they should accept that I am over-qualified for this job. I'm just kind of lazy. :^P And it's not like I can read their minds and KNOW what I should be doing when not doing my regular work.

[identity profile] delphizyx.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 10:17 pm (UTC)(link)
HAHAHAHAH I like the Giant Family part the best. You should sneak that one in the real bulletin :)

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 04:01 am (UTC)(link)
I used that clip-art in the real bulletin for the past couple weeks when it occurred to me that the people were REALLY BIG. :^) Man, now I know how Patch Adams felt in that movie...hehe

[identity profile] elsewhereangel.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 10:25 pm (UTC)(link)
I lovitz. (sorry).

[identity profile] docjeed.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 11:22 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't think you are, at all. ;-)

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[identity profile] emmycantbemeeko.livejournal.com 2006-01-19 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
The "Welcome the Giants" part made me laugh so hard juice came out my nose.

[identity profile] welfy.livejournal.com 2006-01-20 03:59 am (UTC)(link)
I actually used that clip art for the bulletin last week and after looking at it for a long time, I thought, WOW, those people look bigger than the church! Like Clifford the Big Red Dog! :^)

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